Relationship Counselling - Why Choose It?
Posted on December 16, 2009
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There’s no way to get around the fact that while our closest relationships can bring us security, love and companionship, they can also be a minefield of conflict, challenges and disagreements! None are more so than the intimate relationships between couples. Relationship counselling can aid communication and enable couples to overcome serious areas of conflict in the long term.
Conflict Areas
There are many conflict-causing topics in a relationship, do any of these relate to you:
* Parenting Methods
* Sex
* Money
* Politics
* Religion
* Other Members of the Family
* Outside Interests
* Housework
* Jealousy
The future of the relationship may be threatened by an inability for a couple to resulve theses issues. This is where relationship counselling comes in and can be extremely helpful.
Resentment & Responsibilities
When we’re in first flourishes of being in love it can be impossible to imagine that there will ever be a time when we might need to see a relationship counsellor. As time goes on though, and more responsibilities are heaped onto the relationship such as debt, parenting and running a house, those initial feelings of being deeply in love can get overshadowed by arguments and resentments. If these are left unresolved they can eat into the positive aspects of the relationship.
It’s important to note at this point that not all conflict is bad! Relationship conflict can be healthy and is inevitable.Moreover, it can really stregthen the bonds of the relationship, if it is managed well.
Communication Problems
It’s really about how disagreements and conflict are addressed in the relationship. If you can talk about any aspect of your relationship honestly, openly and respectfully then you are unlikely to need help with your relationship. But when we reach a stalemate with our partner and resentments have escalated into an ongoing struggle, deciding to go into relationship counselling is a very healthy and positive step. At the very least it means that you both want the relationship to continue – just not in it’s current form.
A skilful relationship counsellor will be objective, help you communicate your real thoughts and feelings with each other and will not take sides. He or she may help you explore the roots of the conflict which could have come from experiences in your respective childhoods, rather than a fundamental problem in your relationship.
Good relationship counselling will help you heal your relationship by teaching you how to be really honest about your deepest feelings, anxieties and insecurities and also teach you to respect each others differences. It will help you to listen properly to each other and stop assuming you know what the other is thinking or feeling, which underlies many relationship breakdowns.
Deciding to choose relationship counselling is definitely a step in the right direction!
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